Scaredy Cat
Its early and I'm still sipping on my morning coffee so please excuse the laziness. I can't remember who said it, but someone smarter than me said "Do what scares you." Or some sort of thing that sorta sounds like that.
I took this advice. Actually, I'm taking it twice. No, wait... three times. And I have to say that it sounds really great when you read it from a bumper sticker. Its entirely different when you actually do it. If I wasn't scared, I'd be stupid. At least that's what they said on Game of Thrones this past week (Theon to Robb, in the tent as they prepared to go to war to fight for Ned Stark. Obsessed? Me? A little.)
1. Public speaking: I am performing a wedding on Saturday. For people I don't know. I am terrified of one thing only: crying. I'm a mushball and if I start crying during the ceremony I will feel like the biggest loser in the world. I don't know these people!!!
2. Dance class: I am signing up for ballet lessons for the summer with my daughters. Normally this would be awesome and fun, but the thing is, I'm terrified. I get to see just how far this body has fallen from where it was. Its easy to fool yourself into thinking you're just a bit chunky from the recliner. You put tights on and things get real, real fast. Also, my mind knows what to do. It knows all the places your arms and shoulders and hips and knees and feet are supposed to do. I'm wondering what's going to happen when old habit tries to kick in and my body just falls to tiny pieces all over the floor. This is gonna hurt.
3. Promotion: I was recently promoted to Telecommunications Supervisor. My new gig starts Monday. And after all these years of having all the answers, knowing how to fix it and making sure everyone around me knew I had these solutions, I get to actually put my money where my mouth is.
Doing what you fear makes you want to cry, quit, cancel, bury your head under a pillow. I have wanted to chicken out of the wedding at least 100 times but now its way too close. My procrastination has forced me to do this.
Seriously though, if I cry at this wedding do you have any idea how horrible that will be? Its one thing to sniffle at your best friends' secret wedding in Stanley Park, but its entirely different to stand in front of 200 people and cry over strangers getting hitched. They're lovely people and they have an adorable little boy with these blond curls that make you giggle in your head. If I ruin their moment with my own sappy bologna I will never forgive myself.
I took this advice. Actually, I'm taking it twice. No, wait... three times. And I have to say that it sounds really great when you read it from a bumper sticker. Its entirely different when you actually do it. If I wasn't scared, I'd be stupid. At least that's what they said on Game of Thrones this past week (Theon to Robb, in the tent as they prepared to go to war to fight for Ned Stark. Obsessed? Me? A little.)
1. Public speaking: I am performing a wedding on Saturday. For people I don't know. I am terrified of one thing only: crying. I'm a mushball and if I start crying during the ceremony I will feel like the biggest loser in the world. I don't know these people!!!
2. Dance class: I am signing up for ballet lessons for the summer with my daughters. Normally this would be awesome and fun, but the thing is, I'm terrified. I get to see just how far this body has fallen from where it was. Its easy to fool yourself into thinking you're just a bit chunky from the recliner. You put tights on and things get real, real fast. Also, my mind knows what to do. It knows all the places your arms and shoulders and hips and knees and feet are supposed to do. I'm wondering what's going to happen when old habit tries to kick in and my body just falls to tiny pieces all over the floor. This is gonna hurt.
3. Promotion: I was recently promoted to Telecommunications Supervisor. My new gig starts Monday. And after all these years of having all the answers, knowing how to fix it and making sure everyone around me knew I had these solutions, I get to actually put my money where my mouth is.
Doing what you fear makes you want to cry, quit, cancel, bury your head under a pillow. I have wanted to chicken out of the wedding at least 100 times but now its way too close. My procrastination has forced me to do this.
Seriously though, if I cry at this wedding do you have any idea how horrible that will be? Its one thing to sniffle at your best friends' secret wedding in Stanley Park, but its entirely different to stand in front of 200 people and cry over strangers getting hitched. They're lovely people and they have an adorable little boy with these blond curls that make you giggle in your head. If I ruin their moment with my own sappy bologna I will never forgive myself.
KEEP LOOKING AT THE LITTLE BOY WITH THE BLOND HAIR..IT WILL KEEP YOU FROM CRYING,,
ReplyDeleteYOU CAN DO IT ("ARNOLD")
ReplyDeletewhere's this dance class?
ReplyDeletedo they offer other adult dance classes?