Total Grinch Here (Sorry mom for the bad words below)
There is a pile of carboard boxes in my bedroom. Most of them are from Amazon, a few from Etsy and even one from a Craigslist purchase. Not one thing is wrapped. Its all sort of stacked up and hanging out. I don't really even know what is in most of them. I do know that this is really what Christmas has become for me. A pile of stuff for my kids, meticulously chosen to match a dollar amount budgeted for each of them. I like buying this stuff and its nice that I am able to do this. But really, I'm not feeling it this year. I am completely faking it.
I wanted to write about how much I love this time of year and what a joy life is, but for whatever reason, I only feel overwhelmed and stressed out. I'm either getting too old or too lazy for this. I hide that from the kids pretty well and I play the music and we do Santa stuff, but deep down? I could care less.
Here's what bothers me. I hear a lot of grumblings about putting Christ back in Christmas. Nobody took him out. Have Christmas. Go to church, eat your cracker thingy and sip on your wine. Have. At. It. You can even wish an agnostic like me Merry Christmas or Happy Festivus. I don't care. Its your religion, call it whatever you want. Get over yourselves, please.
However, there's also Hanukkah. And Kwanzaa. And don't come at me with this "But that's made up?" THEY ARE ALL MADE UP. Unless you are worshiping the Babylonian sun god (which is where all these holidays stem from - it has to do with the sun and the moon and the shortness of days - that's it), you made it up. Jesus, if he was born at all, wasn't born on December 25th. That was a pagan holiday the newbie Christians stole. Get over it. So put Shamash back into Christmas. That actually might be really fun. I mean, they celebrated with a wild, drunken orgy at midnight. Now that's a midnight Mass!
This holiday is only reminding me of all the bullshit religion out there and the horror those religions have brought to this world. Yes, horror. Wars. Persecution. Guilt. Fear. Loathing. I hate them all exactly the same.
Its Giftmas in my house. Its about a tree (pagan ritual) with lights on it (also pagan). Its about a magical/made up dude (Santa) who leaves presents for my kids (real). They get very happy and very excited and then we eat ourselves silly. Essentially, its just Thanksgiving with a fucking tree and presents.
I can't believe it. I can't believe I actually went Full Scrooge.
There's still time right? To get it back I mean? Maybe I'm just grumpy today. You know what? Check back in another day and maybe I'll be back to normal. I used to love this stupid time of year.
Maybe I need snow?
I wanted to write about how much I love this time of year and what a joy life is, but for whatever reason, I only feel overwhelmed and stressed out. I'm either getting too old or too lazy for this. I hide that from the kids pretty well and I play the music and we do Santa stuff, but deep down? I could care less.
Here's what bothers me. I hear a lot of grumblings about putting Christ back in Christmas. Nobody took him out. Have Christmas. Go to church, eat your cracker thingy and sip on your wine. Have. At. It. You can even wish an agnostic like me Merry Christmas or Happy Festivus. I don't care. Its your religion, call it whatever you want. Get over yourselves, please.
However, there's also Hanukkah. And Kwanzaa. And don't come at me with this "But that's made up?" THEY ARE ALL MADE UP. Unless you are worshiping the Babylonian sun god (which is where all these holidays stem from - it has to do with the sun and the moon and the shortness of days - that's it), you made it up. Jesus, if he was born at all, wasn't born on December 25th. That was a pagan holiday the newbie Christians stole. Get over it. So put Shamash back into Christmas. That actually might be really fun. I mean, they celebrated with a wild, drunken orgy at midnight. Now that's a midnight Mass!
This holiday is only reminding me of all the bullshit religion out there and the horror those religions have brought to this world. Yes, horror. Wars. Persecution. Guilt. Fear. Loathing. I hate them all exactly the same.
Its Giftmas in my house. Its about a tree (pagan ritual) with lights on it (also pagan). Its about a magical/made up dude (Santa) who leaves presents for my kids (real). They get very happy and very excited and then we eat ourselves silly. Essentially, its just Thanksgiving with a fucking tree and presents.
I can't believe it. I can't believe I actually went Full Scrooge.
There's still time right? To get it back I mean? Maybe I'm just grumpy today. You know what? Check back in another day and maybe I'll be back to normal. I used to love this stupid time of year.
Maybe I need snow?
I couldn't have said it better Jenn! Even when I dream of stepping back and simplifying, I don't seem to have time to plan how to do that! In my head I sip cocoa by the fire, while my family sings carols around a tree that we all decorated, but in reality I'm a walking anxiety attack, my 21 and 18 year olds would rather be tied up and made to listen to Barry Manilow than to help decorate OR sing, and I can't help but think this to myself that this would be a much better holiday if presents were banished from it.
ReplyDeleteSORRY BUT, THINK ABOUT HOW MUCH FUN OUR PARENTS MADE IT FOR US ,THE TIME AND THE GREAT DAY WE HAD AND YOU ALL HAVE A FAMILY MEMMBER TO SIT WITH THAT MORNING AND ENJOY THAT TIME, PLEASE KEEP THAT TIME YOU HAVE WITH THEM CLOSE TO YOUR HEART NEVER KNOW WHEN IT WILL END, I KNOW THIS TIME IS CRAZY BUT REALLY COME ON, GOD YES GOD I MISS THIS you know who
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