The Fly Incident of 2005

I was rocking JP. The time was 5:25PM. All was quiet on the eastern front. Suddenly, out of nowhere a fly suicide bombs my left ear! I think it flies away as I whack at my ear. The rocking of JP continues.

BBZZT BBZZZZZZT!

"Take the baby!!" I scream to Aaron. "TAKE THE BABY!!"

"What's wrong?!" He asks.

"THERE'S A BUG IN MY EAR! OH MY GOD! GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT! AHHHHH! I CAN FEEL IT! IT'S MOVING! OH MY GOD IT'S BUZZING IN MY EAR!!!"

I run, full tilt through the house screaming! I run upstairs, nothing up there to get it out. I run back downstairs. So I do what any rational person would do... I call my mom.

"MOM! GET IT OUT! HOW DO I GET IT OUT?"

"Jenn... what's going on? What - "

"THERE'S A BUG IN MY EAR! A FLY FLEW INTO MY EAR!"

"Oh God... ummmm.... try squirting water into it. I don't know, go to the ER."

So calm she was. Having been through a similar experience years ago with a moth, I was thinking she would have the magical ability to use mind powers and remove the fly over the phone. Thanks mom...

I hang up.

BZZZT BZZZZZZZZT!

It's getting angry now. Trying to burrow in further. Pain is starting in my ear.

I run throught house looking for the nose squeezy thing from the hospital when the boys were born. Trying to frantically remember if I had used it for it's intended purpose. Teh bug was bad enough. I didn't want to add insult to injury.

I find one in the boys' room. I fill it with water. SKOOOOOOSH!

Bug gets jammed in further and now I have water in my ear too.

Mind you , I'm still in a state of complete panic... I'm screaming... "OH MY GOD! PLEASE COME OUT! PLEASE COME OUT!"

Aaron is standing at the door of the bathroom. JP is staring at my antics. Seth is still sleeping in the living room.

I fly (no pun intended) downstairs, grab my keys and tell Aaron I am going to the ER.

I try to drive a standard while holding my ear so the fly will stop moving.

Two hours later, a laughing ER doctor, one dead houselfy, and a sheepish Jenn... the horrors were over.

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