Leanne
I've had my cell phone and number for ohhh... maybe like 9 months now. Since I got the phone I've had quite the colorful array of folks calling looking for Leanne. I wrote about this here.
Since my post way back in January, I've had dirty pics (totally gross) sent to me, messages from Leanne's mom, her aunt, her friends, a few kids and just now a text message:
"Umm why nhaik didn't get invited to the party"
I wrote back, "Who is this?" If its an adult... I am totally going to screw with (when I first published this post, I forgot the word "with" and it really changed the meaning of the sentence) this person. My thoughts in response have been the following
1. Because he bleeped my sister
2. Because he bleeped your mom
3. Because he bleeped your dad
4. Because that rat bastard just stole my dog.
5. Because I killed him
6. Because your mom killed him
Not very original, I'm not great at this sort of thing. Comments welcome!
Update - Its someone named Aisa. I replied, "Because he a prick." She writes back: "Trick! u kno I'm pregnant." I had not planned on Aisa being pregnant by Nhaik, so I decided to amend my response to: "My bad I musta forgot. Let him know."
Waiting for reply. I wonder what situation I've created here? Nhaik obviously wasn't invited to Leanne's party. Why? Does Leanne in fact know that Aisa is pregnant with his child? Does Nhaik know?? Maybe Aisa is crazy. Maybe Leanne hates Aisa AND Nhaik (is this pronounced "Nick"?) and that is why she doesn't have Leanne's correct number?
Only time will tell. Come on Aisa, text back!!!
More updates:
Aisa - Where is the party and when
Leanne - my house next friday 10pm
More:
Aisa - u're party or the babys
(oh shit right?)
Leanne - LOL! mines is fri babys is sat 2pm my place
Aisa - I don't know where u live krista said it was forest park
Leanne - (after a google search for homes for sale) 188 sumner
Aisa - what size does she wear
Leanne - (pulling this out of the air and guessing now) like 6-9 mos
Oh no!
Aisa - Why is she so small? (hhahahaah! how old is this baby??) R u gonna be in my delivery room again? And did u get an epidural?
Leanne - wtf is wrong with me?? Of course I will b. No epi - all natural. b strong girl!
Aisa - F that I'm getting one! U saw how bad nhaik effed me up I'm good save ur girl clothes for my daughter ok (dear lord her baby daddy beats her??? do i call dss??)
Leanne - Girl I got so many damn clothes here bring a bag with u sat and i will load u up
Aisa - Ok I need a middle name so start thinking!
~~
And scene! Tune in Saturday when Aisa likely calls/texts when she pulls up into a $400,000 home for sale for a party. Shall I act totally innocent and say things like, "I'm so sorry, but who is this? No, I'm not Leanne. Apologies for the mix up, toodles!"
8/19 Update: More texting last night about jobs. Leanne works at Mercy Hospital now and Aisa makes $14/hr at a bank. She will be by to pick up the baby clothes either tonight (!) or tomorrow!! LOL!
Since my post way back in January, I've had dirty pics (totally gross) sent to me, messages from Leanne's mom, her aunt, her friends, a few kids and just now a text message:
"Umm why nhaik didn't get invited to the party"
I wrote back, "Who is this?" If its an adult... I am totally going to screw with (when I first published this post, I forgot the word "with" and it really changed the meaning of the sentence) this person. My thoughts in response have been the following
1. Because he bleeped my sister
2. Because he bleeped your mom
3. Because he bleeped your dad
4. Because that rat bastard just stole my dog.
5. Because I killed him
6. Because your mom killed him
Not very original, I'm not great at this sort of thing. Comments welcome!
Update - Its someone named Aisa. I replied, "Because he a prick." She writes back: "Trick! u kno I'm pregnant." I had not planned on Aisa being pregnant by Nhaik, so I decided to amend my response to: "My bad I musta forgot. Let him know."
Waiting for reply. I wonder what situation I've created here? Nhaik obviously wasn't invited to Leanne's party. Why? Does Leanne in fact know that Aisa is pregnant with his child? Does Nhaik know?? Maybe Aisa is crazy. Maybe Leanne hates Aisa AND Nhaik (is this pronounced "Nick"?) and that is why she doesn't have Leanne's correct number?
Only time will tell. Come on Aisa, text back!!!
More updates:
Aisa - Where is the party and when
Leanne - my house next friday 10pm
More:
Aisa - u're party or the babys
(oh shit right?)
Leanne - LOL! mines is fri babys is sat 2pm my place
Aisa - I don't know where u live krista said it was forest park
Leanne - (after a google search for homes for sale) 188 sumner
Aisa - what size does she wear
Leanne - (pulling this out of the air and guessing now) like 6-9 mos
Oh no!
Aisa - Why is she so small? (hhahahaah! how old is this baby??) R u gonna be in my delivery room again? And did u get an epidural?
Leanne - wtf is wrong with me?? Of course I will b. No epi - all natural. b strong girl!
Aisa - F that I'm getting one! U saw how bad nhaik effed me up I'm good save ur girl clothes for my daughter ok (dear lord her baby daddy beats her??? do i call dss??)
Leanne - Girl I got so many damn clothes here bring a bag with u sat and i will load u up
Aisa - Ok I need a middle name so start thinking!
~~
And scene! Tune in Saturday when Aisa likely calls/texts when she pulls up into a $400,000 home for sale for a party. Shall I act totally innocent and say things like, "I'm so sorry, but who is this? No, I'm not Leanne. Apologies for the mix up, toodles!"
8/19 Update: More texting last night about jobs. Leanne works at Mercy Hospital now and Aisa makes $14/hr at a bank. She will be by to pick up the baby clothes either tonight (!) or tomorrow!! LOL!
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